no ordinary love

So I just took a lot of tylenol PM, and a beer (contraindicated!), so I don't want anyone to get too excited, but I'm gonna try to come back to le blog. I have an INCREDIBLE new camera the my bf's mom got me for my graduation (Olympus, PEN EP 2, ya be jelz), but I haven't even had time to play with it or learn how to play with it for that matter and it's very upsetting. So I'm gonna start.

I need to become one with my camera before August, when I will be spending about 10 days in NY and about 8 days in Virgin Gorda at the home of a good family friend.

In any case, I am CONSTANTLY thinking about bloggable topics which I never implement because I spend too much time researching and obsessing about the topics then have to direct my peabrain in other directions lest my monomania overtake all. I will set forth a few of these topics and maybe a brief synopsis of each as a reminder to you, and to myself, that we should look into this more and maybe contemplate writing something about it:

1. Toxoplasmosis - the most interesting thing ever EVER in the history of the last 5 days of my rampant googling lifestyle. Basically, ruh roh tylenol pm gotta make this quick: So there is this parasite, the toxoplasma. This parasite can live in all kinds of creatures, even us. It can live there, but it really prefers to live in one kind of creature: cats. Only when it finds a cat host-body can the toxoplasma complete its life cycle, it's like Schopenhaur's conception of "the will to live," but for a parasitic disease. It's beautiful and poetic, it's NATURE, people. Toxoplasmosis had to find a better way to find and invade the body of cats. So you know what it did, it fucking LEARNED HOW TO CONTROL MINDS. I know, this is all very hard to believe. It's all very unscientific sounding. But look, I'm gonna break it down for you:

• for a long time, scientists have known that when toxoplasma infects rodents, like say rats, something happens to the rats that makes them do something strange. Instead of running from cats, the rats will sort of... sort of like seek cats out. Like they will be attracted to the smells of cats, they won't want to run from them. They will put themselves in danger. Scientists were like... WUT? first off we know toxoplasma can only live in cats, secondly, did anyone notice that rats who get it like basically try to get caught by cats? well, it's bc the toxoplasma goes into your brain, and it basically makes itself into something that your brain will think is just a normal brain thing like a serotonin just riding along just part of the normal firing of synapses. but really it's changing your thinking so you will do its bidding (i.e. find a cat for it to get into).
• Scientists for a long time accepted all this, and knew humans had toxoplasma all the time nbd. But basically, the idea that it could change human behavior was something many scientists postulated but testing the theory was too much of a clusterfuck and they prob also didn't want to study something that sounds so absured, right? Plus there were just too many independent variables etc. like who's to say ppl with toxoplasmosis don't just get headaches more bc they are doing x, y or z differently. So who's to say if the toxoplasma caused differences in behavior or the difs in behavior led to risky behavior that made you more likely to get it. whatever this is way too long already, sorry.
• anyways they now have basically proven that it does change humans in some fascinating ways. Personally, I don't think it's good or bad (ok I think it's good secretly and totally believe I have it), but ppl who have it exhibit some very interesting difs:

1. WAY more prone to getting into car accidents, which is believed to just be incidental to the one that I am really most interested in:
2. ppl who have it are less cautious in general. Engage in more high risk behaviors, don't reflect as much etc.
3. women who have it are rated as being more attractive. They also I guess tend to be more promiscuous
4. men who have it tend to be rated as being less attractive. They exhibit some negative qualities such as possesiveness and jealousy more than others.
5. BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY: since some countries have low rates, and some have much much higher rates (for example, like 1/9 Americans has it or something; and like 2/3 of French (ok I totally made those numbers up but you get the point))... there are now questions about whether this parasite has like, you know, shaped history in some small way by shaping actions and attitudes of entire cultures. I mean, this all sounds very sci-fi, but isn't it like the most amazing shit ever? I think it is.

2. Studying for the bar - JK! Not something I want to blog about. Maybe something I should write about in a special notebook with a tiny padlock on it, preceded by the words "Dear Diary, ..."

3. ummmm... I swear I had like 15 things to talk about. Like how sometimes I will be trying to study then I will be overcome with the need to know right this moment how do chickens lay eggs, then I google it then I watch a video on youtube of a chicken laying an egg then I click on "cow giving birth" and before you know it I'm like 6 pages into a scientific study that I don't even understand at all on the topic of antibiotic treatment of dairy cows treated with Posilac* (*also known as recombinant bovine growth hormone). UGH. where am I even going with all this!?

4. This list will be flushed out tomorrow. My brainstorms will all come flooding back to me tomorrow as soon as I get even a peripheral glance at my civ pro notes...